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Week in Review: 6/1/14

Movies I Watched in the Last Week

1) I, Frankenstein - I was hoping this was going to be one of those misguided spectacles that's full of hilarious moments, but I was astonished by how goddamned boring it was.  It's been awhile since I've seen something that is so aggressively, terrifyingly plodding.  It is intense in its ability to dull all sense of emotion.  You will literally be on the edge of your seat waiting to see how quickly you'll fall asleep.  I think I'm doing this wrong.  Is hyperbole still funny, you guys?

My Rating:  1 / 5

2) Frozen Ground - I'm not big on procedural crime thrillers.  Even when they're well made, which this one generally was, I kinda just don't really get gripped by them.  That being said, I fear that many people are (or will be) disappointed by this one since they see that Nicolas Cage is in it and they think, "Ohmygod he's gonna be cuh-razy!"  He's not.  It's just a procedural crime drama.

My Rating: 3 / 5

3) Perrier's Bounty - This movie was predictable, its jokes often fell flat, and it thought it was being a lot more hip and clever than it actually was.  Even so, it did enough things right that I enjoyed it throughout.  It's basically what your B choice would have been at the video store if all the Guy Ritchie movies were rented out.  Maybe put this one at the bottom of your list and check it out after you've seen all the other UK gang-themed comedies.

My Rating: 4 / 5

4) The Bodyguard 2 - Like the first movie, the best scene happens at the beginning.  Unfortunately, the remainder is not nearly as funny or entertaining as the first movie.  There's also a grotesque misogynistic vein running throughout, so you've got that to deal with.

My Rating: 3 / 5

5) A Fantastic Fear of Everything - Man, I don't know what's with all the 3 / 5s this week.  This one is a Simon Pegg comedy - which should automatically make it an automatic Win - but it just didn't really make me laugh or get me too psyched up.  I'm probably giving it too high a rating just because Pegg always managed to elevate the material he's given, but if you're looking for a second-tier Pegg comedy that's actually pretty enjoyable, you'd be better off going with Run Fatboy Run.

My Rating: 3 / 5

Total: 5 Movies

Minutes I Spent Writing in the Last Week

1) Born Loser - About four hours of writing.  Current draft length: 34,000 words.

Total: 4 Hours

The Winner:  Movies...

No commentary this week.  I'm getting back to work.